standard issue

I have recently started to scrutinise every inch of my home.  Generally, all that stuff that falls into the 'fixtures and fittings' category simply doesn't get a considered look in when it comes to the form versus function debate - except to say they serve a function.  End of.  When the house needs re-wiring, one calls an electrician.  And one's options end right about there.  OK, so you may be asked 'Where'd ya want yer sockets love?' but standard issue dictates that wherever you want your sockets, they'll be white.  And plastic.  Same goes with the lighting.  A white plastic ceiling rose, white plastic cable, white plastic bulb holder.  White.  Plastic.  I'm not sure at what point it was decided to replace fabric covered lighting cables of old or unassuming ceiling roses and ceramic bulb holders with the white plastic variety … but really, what a great shame.  As a nation we've been forced to express our individuality by the only means we know how ... a light shade. 

Add to my white/plastic procrastination of late the fuckwittedness on the part of an electrician I'd hired to do the most simplest of jobs, I decided to take matters into my own hands.  I'm not sure what it is about this country - possibly an overbearing health and safety executive - but do-it-yourself electrics just isn't the done thing.  Why?  I have both Google and a mains tester screwdriver.  And I'm smart enough to know I shouldn't perform any electrical work while standing in a bucket of water, or something.

Half an hour after flipping the mains switch to OFF, I'd made a small but significant change to the bedroom.  No more white plastic, no more standard issue dangling from the ceiling.  Now the room has as its centrepiece lighting components which I had chosen, which I had worked out how to fit and which I had successfully hooked up to the lighting circuit without blowing myself up.  OK, so I still need to figure out how to casually loop the cord and do away with the bulldog clip, but that aside, I'm pretty pleased with the overall effect.